The more I think about blaming others, the more I see what a devastating effect it has on the lives of so many, and then the less I want to think about it.
So where does it come from, what causes us to become blamers, looking to other people to be the cause or source of our misfortune. Firstly I’d like to outline some things where we do blame others, these are just some thoughts, just as they come up. In fact some of these are probably because I myself have done or continue to do them.
“My job sucks, things will be better when I get a promotion or change jobs.”
“That person makes my life so difficult, I can’t do anything because of them.”
“If only (something) hadn’t/had happened then (something) would be better.”
One thing we must remember however, before I go on, is that we must NEVER try to play down someone elses pain or hurt, even if it appears to be their own fault. God is the judge, the standards by which we judge others will be the standards by which we are judged. Care and understanding is always necessary, because these things often cause very deep pain.
So, firstly lets look at the person who hoping a new job will help them. The realities are that a new job could very well be better for the person, a promotion too could do the same thing. One thing we have to note is the business world. Often the reason for wanting the move or change is something that has not been fulfilled by our work. Maybe the co-workers are a pain in the butt, maybe the boss is not nice.
But have you tried to change the situation?
Many times wonderful things begin to happen when one person decides they are going to put asside their personal needs and wants and try to help others, and see the other persons side. Have you actively stopped talking about fellow employees and the boss behind their back. Become their advocates and look for the best in them, very often simply finding the positive things in someone else is a good start. Or at the very least, just stop gossiping. I have found that very often the complaints about someone else are actually a very true reflection of your own shortcomings. Action, and talking to the other person about issues that are on your mind is infinitely more useful than talking about them. It takes character and strength to do this quite often, but it’s well worth it.
I appears I have pretty much covered the annoying other person comment.
It’s sad to say but blaming appears to become the way people do things from childhood. The school “system” and don’t forget that’s what it is, schools did not look like they do today a few hundred years ago. Our current education system has children stuck in chairs from a ridiculously young age learning things that were useful to explorers two hundred years ago, but not very relevent today, quite often. This system does not allow children to develop the skills they need to get on with others. It is a very basic thing to pass the blame onto others, I have seen my own classes of children do this. Children need to develop the character to accept their mistakes, parents need to discontinue disproportionate punishment for childrens mistakes, and make them take responsibility in a sensible manner. This way we can help them to grow up to be mature adults who can work well with others.
So in conclusion I think we all need to consider where we put the blame. If we can do something, then do it. If you’re in the situation already, think about what you can do. Don’t blame the system, find a way to work with it, become a leader. Christ was the greatest leader, and what did he do? He served.
Jesus was terrified when he was on his way to be crucified, but he brought his fears before God with prayer and all the time was a servant.
I pray that each of us can become more like this, and realise what wonderful plans God has in store for out lives. Stop worrying about all of your own problems and become a servant.
Until next time, God bless.